Year of a Fierce Heart

A little over a year ago, hyped up on caffeine, I sat in my living room late late at night shivering slightly writing a blog post about how I was done settling. How I knew what I wanted but was tired of being scared of it because it’s different than mainstream. And at the time that was a really big thing–really big and really scary. Now a year later I’m looking back on that post and the things it says still resonate with me, and it’s interesting to see how time passing makes a different, scary decision seem completely normal. Like, how could I have ever thought to settle? How could I have ever thought that I didn’t want to pursue my music career? But it makes sense. Sometimes it is necessary to go through struggle to find the things that are true about yourself. Sometimes you can only know what is when you know what is not.

It’s exceedingly encouraging to see how my plan is progressing somewhat divinely. In my very first post I proposed a plan. The Year One goal was to finish up with school. While that did not go exactly as planned (i.e. getting a degree), I am done with school. So that’s checked off. The Year Two goal was: get a full time job, preferably at the Museum. This is where things get interesting. A month ago, it was looking very unlikely that a position would be open in my department any time soon, so I went and got my job back at Goodberry’s. Then, a week later, and exactly one year and two days after I wrote my blog post containing the words, “Year Two: Get a full time job”, I was told that a full time position was opening immediately in my department, starting at the beginning of the month. It’s a perfect position–it’s an addition, so none of my coworkers are leaving, it has full benefits, and I was just about to buy my own health insurance that week, and it’s probably a two year temporary position. My dad and I worked out the budget, and with this job and additional work at Goodberry’s, I’ll have all my trip money saved up in 2 years.

Oh yeah, and that’s the only thing. It’s more like three years of a fierce heart, because I decided that I wanted to travel longer and to more places.

Things are looking good. More to come soon on other thoughts about Future.